Author Topic: One-liners (Read 34267 times)

Rodders · « **Reply #17 on:** April 28, 2015, 21:22 »

A bloke goes into the opticians. "I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes," says the man. "Have you ever seen a doctor?" asks the optician. The man replies, "No, just spots."

Simon · « **Reply #18 on:** April 28, 2015, 21:35 »

Clive · « **Reply #19 on:** April 28, 2015, 22:48 »

Rodders · « **Reply #20 on:** May 01, 2015, 15:38 »

It's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go "Aaaaaarrrghhhh!" and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.

Clive · « **Reply #21 on:** May 01, 2015, 18:16 »

Simon · « **Reply #22 on:** May 01, 2015, 22:36 »

Rodders · « **Reply #23 on:** May 02, 2015, 11:34 »

I rang up a local building firm and said "I want a skip outside my house." He said, "I'm not stopping you."

Simon · « **Reply #24 on:** May 02, 2015, 11:42 »

Clive · « **Reply #25 on:** May 02, 2015, 13:05 »

Rodders · « **Reply #26 on:** May 05, 2015, 14:28 »

I went to buy a watch and the man in the shop said "Analogue?" I said, "No, just a watch."

Clive · « **Reply #27 on:** May 05, 2015, 14:32 »

Simon · « **Reply #28 on:** May 05, 2015, 15:59 »

Rodders · « **Reply #29 on:** May 06, 2015, 10:03 »

In a restaurant a man asks the waiter, "I'm just wondering how you prepare your chickens?" "Nothing special, sir. We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."

Author Topic: One-liners (Read 34267 times)

Simon

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Rodders

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Simon

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Clive

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Rodders

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Clive

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Simon

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Clive

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Rodders

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