11
The Laughter Zone / Re: BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER
« Last post by Simon on April 04, 2024, 10:12 »
Recent Posts
12
The Laughter Zone / BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER
« Last post by Den on April 04, 2024, 08:44 »BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER
Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand-new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Husband
PS don’t try to find me. Your SISTER, Carla, & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
.
.
.
Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping, too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if I can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers, I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So, when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone ... Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Your Free and Rich EX-Wife
PS … I hope you and my SISTER have a great life.
By-The-Way, did she tell you her name use to be 'Carl' before her operation?....
Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand-new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Husband
PS don’t try to find me. Your SISTER, Carla, & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
.
.
.
Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping, too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if I can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers, I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So, when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone ... Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Your Free and Rich EX-Wife
PS … I hope you and my SISTER have a great life.
By-The-Way, did she tell you her name use to be 'Carl' before her operation?....
13
The Buzz / Re: Mark Knopfler releases new charity single with 60 guest musicians
« Last post by Clive on March 30, 2024, 20:36 »Very enjoyable and much better than Bring him Home from Les Misery.
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The Buzz / Re: Mark Knopfler releases new charity single with 60 guest musicians
« Last post by Simon on March 30, 2024, 20:06 »I've played the record several times, but I've yet to actually sit and watch the video. Thanks for the reminder, Den! 😎
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The Buzz / Re: Mark Knopfler releases new charity single with 60 guest musicians
« Last post by Den on March 30, 2024, 18:45 »Oh my God. I have just played that and loved every second of it. Will play it again later. Thank you Simon. 
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The Buzz / Re: Mark Knopfler releases new charity single with 60 guest musicians
« Last post by Simon on March 23, 2024, 00:19 »There's a video out now, which seems to suggest who's playing at any given moment:
https://youtu.be/zBGm7gJtSZE
https://youtu.be/zBGm7gJtSZE
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The Buzz / Re: Steve Harley: Cockney Rebel musician dies aged 73
« Last post by Den on March 17, 2024, 19:51 »Thats so sad indeed. 
Steve.
Steve.18
The Buzz / Steve Harley: Cockney Rebel musician dies aged 73
« Last post by Simon on March 17, 2024, 11:39 »Musician Steve Harley has died of cancer aged 73.
The singer, who perfomed as part of Cockney Rebel, was touring up until January 2024, but was forced to cancel dates after being diagnosed with cancer.
His most well-known song was “Make Me Smile (Come Up and See Me)”, which he wrote and released in 1975.
In a social media post on 13 February, the musician’s team shared that Harley hoped he would be better next year as they wrote: “Due to on-going treatment for cancer, Steve cannot commit to any concerts in 2024.
“Steve is hoping next year will be altogether different. He appreciates all your kind words and good wishes. Team SH.”
https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/steve-harley-death-cockney-rebel-make-me-smile-b2513960.html
The singer, who perfomed as part of Cockney Rebel, was touring up until January 2024, but was forced to cancel dates after being diagnosed with cancer.
His most well-known song was “Make Me Smile (Come Up and See Me)”, which he wrote and released in 1975.
In a social media post on 13 February, the musician’s team shared that Harley hoped he would be better next year as they wrote: “Due to on-going treatment for cancer, Steve cannot commit to any concerts in 2024.
“Steve is hoping next year will be altogether different. He appreciates all your kind words and good wishes. Team SH.”
https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/steve-harley-death-cockney-rebel-make-me-smile-b2513960.html
19
The Buzz / Mark Knopfler releases new charity single with 60 guest musicians
« Last post by Simon on March 15, 2024, 11:13 »Mark Knopfler's stunning nine-minute-plus re-recording of his 1983 solo single Going Home (Theme from Local Hero), featuring contributions from some of the world's greatest guitarists, is now available to purchase and stream, with all funds being donated to the Teenage Cancer Trust and Teen Cancer America.
The truly astonishing line-up of talent on the single, released today, March 15, includes, among others, David Gilmour, The Who's Pete Townshend, Rolling Stones guitarist Ronnie Wood, Queen's Brian May, Bruce Springsteen, Tony Iommi, Eric Clapton, Joan Jett, Joan Armatrading, Alex Lifeson, Hank Marvin, Duane Eddy, Slash, Tom Morello, and the last ever recording by the late, great Jeff Beck.
In addition to this mind-boggling array of iconic guitarists, the track features Ringo Starr on drums, Sting on bass, and long-time Teenage Cancer Trust patron Roger Daltrey on harmonica.
The song was produced by Knopfler's longtime collaborator Guy Fletcher, and recorded at British Grove Studios, in West London. In regards to Jeff Beck's participation in the recording, Fletcher says, “It was absolutely meant to be. And what he did with it, it just brings you to tears.”
https://youtu.be/f_KWnAoPckk
The full list of contributors to the nine minute single is - deep breath - Joan Armatrading, Jeff Beck, Richard Bennett, Joe Bonamassa, Joe Brown, James Burton, Jonathan Cain, Paul Carrack, Eric Clapton, Ry Cooder, Jim Cox, Steve Cropper, Sheryl Crow, Danny Cummings, Roger Daltrey, Duane Eddy, Sam Fender, Guy Fletcher, Peter Frampton, Audley Freed, Vince Gill, David Gilmour, Buddy Guy, Keiji Haino, Tony Iommi, Joan Jett, John Jorgenson, Mark Knopfler, Sonny Landreth, Albert Lee, Greg Leisz, Alex Lifeson, Steve Lukather, Phil Manzanera, Dave Mason, Hank Marvin, Brian May, Robbie McIntosh, John McLaughlin, Tom Morello, Rick Nielsen, Orianthi, Brad Paisley, Nile Rodgers, Mike Rutherford, Joe Satriani, John Sebastian, Connor Selby, Slash, Bruce Springsteen, Ringo Starr and Zak Starkey, Sting, Andy Taylor, Susan Tedeschi and Derek Trucks, Ian Thomas, Pete Townshend, Keith Urban, Steve Vai, Waddy Wachtel, Joe Louis Walker, Joe Walsh, Ronnie Wood, Glenn Worf and Zucchero.
https://www.loudersound.com/news/david-gilmour-pete-townshend-brian-may-tony-iommi-jeff-becks-going-home
The one problem with this is, at nine minutes, it's never going to be played on the radio.
The truly astonishing line-up of talent on the single, released today, March 15, includes, among others, David Gilmour, The Who's Pete Townshend, Rolling Stones guitarist Ronnie Wood, Queen's Brian May, Bruce Springsteen, Tony Iommi, Eric Clapton, Joan Jett, Joan Armatrading, Alex Lifeson, Hank Marvin, Duane Eddy, Slash, Tom Morello, and the last ever recording by the late, great Jeff Beck.
In addition to this mind-boggling array of iconic guitarists, the track features Ringo Starr on drums, Sting on bass, and long-time Teenage Cancer Trust patron Roger Daltrey on harmonica.
The song was produced by Knopfler's longtime collaborator Guy Fletcher, and recorded at British Grove Studios, in West London. In regards to Jeff Beck's participation in the recording, Fletcher says, “It was absolutely meant to be. And what he did with it, it just brings you to tears.”
https://youtu.be/f_KWnAoPckk
The full list of contributors to the nine minute single is - deep breath - Joan Armatrading, Jeff Beck, Richard Bennett, Joe Bonamassa, Joe Brown, James Burton, Jonathan Cain, Paul Carrack, Eric Clapton, Ry Cooder, Jim Cox, Steve Cropper, Sheryl Crow, Danny Cummings, Roger Daltrey, Duane Eddy, Sam Fender, Guy Fletcher, Peter Frampton, Audley Freed, Vince Gill, David Gilmour, Buddy Guy, Keiji Haino, Tony Iommi, Joan Jett, John Jorgenson, Mark Knopfler, Sonny Landreth, Albert Lee, Greg Leisz, Alex Lifeson, Steve Lukather, Phil Manzanera, Dave Mason, Hank Marvin, Brian May, Robbie McIntosh, John McLaughlin, Tom Morello, Rick Nielsen, Orianthi, Brad Paisley, Nile Rodgers, Mike Rutherford, Joe Satriani, John Sebastian, Connor Selby, Slash, Bruce Springsteen, Ringo Starr and Zak Starkey, Sting, Andy Taylor, Susan Tedeschi and Derek Trucks, Ian Thomas, Pete Townshend, Keith Urban, Steve Vai, Waddy Wachtel, Joe Louis Walker, Joe Walsh, Ronnie Wood, Glenn Worf and Zucchero.
https://www.loudersound.com/news/david-gilmour-pete-townshend-brian-may-tony-iommi-jeff-becks-going-home
The one problem with this is, at nine minutes, it's never going to be played on the radio.