91
The Laughter Zone / Re: Yes my Lady.
« Last post by Simon on September 29, 2024, 23:25 »
Recent Posts
93
The Laughter Zone / Red drink.
« Last post by Den on September 29, 2024, 21:41 »Satish and his wife Sarala received a letter from their daughter who had gone to study "Modern Biochemistry" overseas.
She wrote, "My beloved parents, I miss you so much and it breaks my heart to think that by the time I get back, you will be so old.
Therefore, I am enclosing a bottle of a red portion that I have invented. It will make you 5 years younger, and so when I return, you will be the same age as I left you. *Please, take only a drop.*
Goodbye I love you!"
They opened the envelope and found the bottle with the red portion.
Satish looked at his wife and said, "You go first."
Sarala took a drop and when she indeed turned 5 years younger, Satish immediately did the same.
Years later, the daughter returns home to find her mother... She is younger and happier, and she is carrying a baby on her back.
She tells her daughter how the potion worked and how it has made her look younger.
The daughter is happy and she asks about her father.
"Your father? Hmmm! You know how men don't listen! He drank the whole bottle."
"Whaaat! Where is he?"
"Who do you think is on my back?
She wrote, "My beloved parents, I miss you so much and it breaks my heart to think that by the time I get back, you will be so old.
Therefore, I am enclosing a bottle of a red portion that I have invented. It will make you 5 years younger, and so when I return, you will be the same age as I left you. *Please, take only a drop.*
Goodbye I love you!"
They opened the envelope and found the bottle with the red portion.
Satish looked at his wife and said, "You go first."
Sarala took a drop and when she indeed turned 5 years younger, Satish immediately did the same.
Years later, the daughter returns home to find her mother... She is younger and happier, and she is carrying a baby on her back.
She tells her daughter how the potion worked and how it has made her look younger.
The daughter is happy and she asks about her father.
"Your father? Hmmm! You know how men don't listen! He drank the whole bottle."
"Whaaat! Where is he?"
"Who do you think is on my back?
94
The Laughter Zone / Yes my Lady.
« Last post by Den on September 29, 2024, 21:38 »“Oh, Parker?"
“Yus, my lady?”
“Will you take off my coat?”
“Yus, my lady.”
“Now take of my dress.”
“Yus, my lady.”
“Now take of my stockings.”
“Yus, my lady.”
“Now take off my knickers.”
“Yus, my lady.”
“And Parker…..”
“Yus, my lady?”
“Don’t ever let me ever catch you wearing them again”
“Yus, my lady?”
“Will you take off my coat?”
“Yus, my lady.”
“Now take of my dress.”
“Yus, my lady.”
“Now take of my stockings.”
“Yus, my lady.”
“Now take off my knickers.”
“Yus, my lady.”
“And Parker…..”
“Yus, my lady?”
“Don’t ever let me ever catch you wearing them again”
95
The Buzz / Re: Acting legend Dame Maggie Smith dies at 89
« Last post by Clive on September 27, 2024, 21:31 »I first saw her in The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie back in 1969 and seen most of her subsequent work. 
Maggie Smith.
Maggie Smith. 96
The Buzz / Acting legend Dame Maggie Smith dies at 89
« Last post by Simon on September 27, 2024, 17:57 »Actress Dame Maggie Smith, known for the Harry Potter films and Downton Abbey, has died at the age of 89, her family has said.
A legend of British stage and screen, she won two Oscars during her career - for The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie in 1970 and California Suite in 1979.
She had four other nominations, and received seven Bafta awards.
Leading the tributes, Prime Minister Keir Starmer said Dame Maggie "was beloved by so many for her great talent, becoming a true national treasure whose work will be cherished for generations to come".
In the Harry Potter films, Dame Maggie played the acerbic Professor Minerva McGonagall, famous for her pointed witch's hat and stern manner with the young wizards at Hogwarts.
In hit ITV drama Downton Abbey, she played Violet Crawley, the Dowager Countess of Grantham, the grand matriarch who excelled at withering one-liners through the show's six series.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cgk7375ngkxo
A legend of British stage and screen, she won two Oscars during her career - for The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie in 1970 and California Suite in 1979.
She had four other nominations, and received seven Bafta awards.
Leading the tributes, Prime Minister Keir Starmer said Dame Maggie "was beloved by so many for her great talent, becoming a true national treasure whose work will be cherished for generations to come".
In the Harry Potter films, Dame Maggie played the acerbic Professor Minerva McGonagall, famous for her pointed witch's hat and stern manner with the young wizards at Hogwarts.
In hit ITV drama Downton Abbey, she played Violet Crawley, the Dowager Countess of Grantham, the grand matriarch who excelled at withering one-liners through the show's six series.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cgk7375ngkxo
99
The Laughter Zone / Shop lifter.
« Last post by Den on September 24, 2024, 20:26 »A very cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a grocery store.
She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager to the security guard to the arresting officer who took her away.
She complained and criticized everything and everyone throughout the process.
When she appeared before the judge, the judge asked her what she had stolen from the store.
The lady defiantly replied, "Just a stupid can of peaches."
The judge then asked why she had done it.
She replied, "I was hungry and forgot to bring any cash to the store."
The judge asked how many peaches were in the can.
She replied in a nasty tone, "Nine! But why do you care about that?"
The judge answered patiently, "Well, ma'am, because I'm going to give you nine days in jail -- one day for each peach."
As the judge was about to drop his gavel, the lady's long-suffering husband raised his hand slowly and asked if he might speak.
The judge said, "Yes sir, what do you have to add?"
The husband said meekly, "Your Honour, she also stole a can of peas."
She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager to the security guard to the arresting officer who took her away.
She complained and criticized everything and everyone throughout the process.
When she appeared before the judge, the judge asked her what she had stolen from the store.
The lady defiantly replied, "Just a stupid can of peaches."
The judge then asked why she had done it.
She replied, "I was hungry and forgot to bring any cash to the store."
The judge asked how many peaches were in the can.
She replied in a nasty tone, "Nine! But why do you care about that?"
The judge answered patiently, "Well, ma'am, because I'm going to give you nine days in jail -- one day for each peach."
As the judge was about to drop his gavel, the lady's long-suffering husband raised his hand slowly and asked if he might speak.
The judge said, "Yes sir, what do you have to add?"
The husband said meekly, "Your Honour, she also stole a can of peas."
