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General Discussion => The Laughter Zone => Topic started by: mistybear on August 23, 2008, 13:23

Title: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 23, 2008, 13:23
                                                                          A Flat Stomach


A little boy walked into his parents' room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down.

The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find him.

The son sees his mom and asks, 'What were you and Dad doing?'

The mother replies, 'Well, you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it and help flatten it..'

'Your wasting your time,' said the boy.

'Why is that?' the mom asked puzzled.

'Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up.'
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Tony on August 23, 2008, 13:57
 :laugh: :laugh:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Simon on August 23, 2008, 14:36
 :)x
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 23, 2008, 17:05
 :laugh: :-X :devil:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 23, 2008, 22:25
Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings.   :D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 24, 2008, 07:45
Quote
sucklings
   :o   ':|
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Camstop on August 24, 2008, 09:04
 :haha:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 11:33
   :o   ':|
:-X getting close ,where is Clive  :devil:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 24, 2008, 12:27
 :smirks:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 12:48
You should have a word with that MB Clive................Im very easily shocked... ;D

Perhaps that nice lady next door was just inflating his ego :devil:





Checked and double checked and trebled checked for smiley mark up  :devil:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Rik on August 24, 2008, 12:52
 :laugh:

Getting nervous, David. :)
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 13:37
More like excited  :devil:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 24, 2008, 13:43
You should have a word with that MB Clive................Im very easily shocked... ;D

Oh, yes please. I need a good tongue lashing........... ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 24, 2008, 13:54
That's a lot of information MB.   :devil:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 13:59
Must be with talk talk................... :o
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 24, 2008, 14:11
Just as I thought, you guys are all talk.  ::)
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 14:37
Guys dont talk that much MB we are too polite.............................hate to interupt :)x
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 15:16
Just as I thought, you guys are all talk.  ::)

Clive you lied to me     MB does think  ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Rik on August 24, 2008, 15:17
Not just that, David, she remembers.  :o
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 16:42
But she is forgiving...................I love cats too  ;D ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 24, 2008, 16:51
(https://www.pc-pals.com/smf/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi70.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fi84%2Fmistybear_2006%2F8494Everybody-Loves-Pussy-Poster-2.jpg&hash=728d6bd7eedbf13c74bc2d4a0eb96dad21c871f2)
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 16:54
My what a big one you have and so furry,a fine specimen,may I stroke it or does it bite ;D ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 24, 2008, 17:37
Not just that, David, she remembers.  :o

Not when I go up the street without my shopping list. Or when I get up to go to the kitchen for something.......... or even worse, go to say something and completely forget what it was. But I think the worst one of all, and the one that Michael thinks I need to be put in a home for, is, I put my glasses on, to find my glasses. Or the new one I did the other day was, I had my glasses on, and I was getting a little flustered as I couldn't find them.
I either need to cut back on my medication, or, increase it.  :crazy: 
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 17:43
Sound normal tpo me MB and Im not on anything (maybe I need some of yours)  ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 24, 2008, 17:51
Might as well, it's doing bugger all for me. It's almost 3 in the morning, and I'm still making sense. (just)   :crazy:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 24, 2008, 18:07
It's almost 3 in the morning, and I'm still making sense. (just)   :crazy:

Oh I wouldn't go that far MB.   ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 24, 2008, 18:15
 :thumbs: :pmsl: One for the guys  ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 25, 2008, 08:59
Oh I wouldn't go that far MB.   ;D

At least I have an excuse, what's yours,  :smartarse:    :baldy:   :bartmoon:


:thumbs: :pmsl: One for the guys  ;D


You should celebrate David, as it doesn't happen that often.  ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 25, 2008, 22:17
At least I have an excuse, what's yours,  :smartarse:    :baldy:   :bartmoon:

I have never ever claimed to make any sense MB.  Nor have any for that matter.   ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 26, 2008, 08:58
Sorry Clive, I was having a "just got bad news" day. Time to write more letters.  :(
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 26, 2008, 15:56
Awwwww.  Sorry to hear that MB.   :cry:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 26, 2008, 16:42
Hope it works out MB  :cry:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 27, 2008, 10:35
Not much I can do now to stop it, as an application has been made to the court, so it's only a matter of time. But I'm writing to ministers and shadow ministers, in the vain attempt of achieving a favourable outcome. 
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Rik on August 27, 2008, 10:49
Toes crossed for you, MB.
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 27, 2008, 11:18
Hope your BND turns out in your favour MB 
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 27, 2008, 12:35
Thanks Rik, it's difficult to type with crossed fingers.  :)

Thanks David, what's a BND?

I have just spent 6 hours carefully putting a letter together. Attaching the relevant documents, looking up all the email addresses of the relevant ministers and shadow ministers, state and federal, only to get a bloody message back from the postmaster, mail notification.... Failure. Bloody government!!!!

Well at least some of them got delivered. Back to the drawing board.  ???
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 27, 2008, 12:48
Bad News Day MB whatever the problem is I just hope it works out,

Have you made an error in the Email address.................its easy done when you are under pressure..good luck
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Simon on August 28, 2008, 18:37
Sorry to hear your news, MB.  Good luck!  :wub:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 29, 2008, 10:31
Thanks Simon.  :-*

The support you guys give me, means a lot.  :thumbs:

Sitting here for hours on end researching and typing letters. I sometimes wonder why I bother as this has been going on for over a year. I won one battle, but I think I will lose the war. Sometimes I just want to go to bed and not wake up.

My solicitor rang today and suggested that I use the Freedom Of Information Act, to ask for documents that they are basing their application on. I asked him what I should ask for, he said the lot. Probably cost a small fortune in photocopying, might be better spent on the tent I'll need to live in.   :bawl:

I know my battle is insignificant in comparison to the battle some face with ill health, and I should count my blessings, which I do. 2 cats and a kid.  ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 29, 2008, 11:31
No MB I disagree with those who say "count your blessing" many who misuse this old adage are either defeatists
or have not many problems .I think where you are concerned "walk a mile in my shoes"would be more apt.
Your battle is as worrying and frustrating as anyone who is facing a battle of any significance and to (even with good intentions us this qoute are wrong,when any of us face any challenge which affects our lives in such an important way and face the prospect of losing anything so basic as the roof over our heads you have every right to feel as you do.
When an event dominates our lives so much that it takes over our lives or makes us feel as you do then in one way or another you need some support,even if its a voice which is on your side,which listens.This can have dramatic effects on how we view a situation or may help give us that bit of strength when things look so beyond and resolve.

No matter what the problem is MB somewhere there has to be an answer and by the sound of it you need either some help or a break from it,but if something is dominating your mind day in day out,for months or years on end this can be soul destroying or will give you even more determination to get through it or win the day.
I admire your courage I admire your self depricating attitude.
If your battle has,and I suspect meets most if not more than I have stated it is not insignificant.it sounds a little hollow but I really hope you pace yourself and try (and its easier said than done) to give your mind a littlle break now and again,it would appear the odds are against you.this is the kind of battle which is sweeter when you finally can rest in thhe releif thats its over and you have some form of victory nder your belt.

I sincerely hope that you can take a break now and again to recoup your strength,both physically and mentally and find the elusive answer to all of this,because no matter what it it.MB......There is one and your more likely to discover it if you are refreshed and clear thinking.

I also hope that,the little bit of luck,we all need from time to time.comes your way and soon.

Good Luck and it sems apt...Rome wasnt built in a day

David

Its not the challange we face which becomes our enemy,its the fear anxiety,and all the emotins which we are forced to face and they can become demons if allowed to get out of control...to handle something on your own will either make us or break us......Im confident that with you,you have the attributes to endure to the end which in your case could turn out to be ,A Begining
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 29, 2008, 12:36
Awww, now you've gone and made me cry....  :boohoo: you're a sweetie.  :-*

I did take a break this afternoon, and played with Nemo (Tonks), while I tried digging weeds out of my lawn. I find it relaxing, but not so much with Nemo jumping on my back when I bend over. (No, it isn't appropriate to have dirty thoughts  :naughty:)

One of the last things my solicitor said to me, was to look after myself as I was banging myself up against some pretty big walls.   :brickwall: :stars:

My neighbour, who is also in the same position, we live in a duplex, I think you call them "semi's". Well she is going to Paris for a month, some people.  ::)

She has heart disease and is a heavy smoker, so she figures that she hasn't got long, might as well. She hasn't been involved in any of this, as with her health, she wouldn't be able to cope.
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 29, 2008, 14:33
As David says, you have tremendous courage - more than anyone else I know.  We are all thinking of you and hoping everything will work out for you.
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 29, 2008, 14:37
Dont go soft on me now MB (there s a though for us men)go out in the garden,and you are allowed dirty thoughts,its only inappropraite if you enact them whilst in the cold meats section of Tescos,other than that...enjoy  ;D ;D :devil:

Dont forget we are still engaged :-* :-*
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Rik on August 29, 2008, 15:22
One of the last things my solicitor said to me, was to look after myself as I was banging myself up against some pretty big walls.   :brickwall: :stars:

Was that just before he handed you the bill, MB? ;D

Seriously, though, it's sound advice, so make sure you take it.  ;)
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 29, 2008, 15:44
I can't afford a solicitor Rik, if I could, I'd get him to do all the work, or I'd just buy the bloody house. He is a really great guy, or as they say "a top bloke". He is a legal aid solicitor, who has a massive work load and is frustrated by the fact that he isn't allowed to represent anyone, only phone advice. I have seen him a few times and he is as sharp as a razor. I usually email him and send him documents so he can look them over when he has time, so then all he has to do is phone me with a yay or a nay as to which way to go.

When I went up there earlier in the year to use their fax machine, their receptionist told me that it wasn't worth losing my health over and perhaps I should just walk away. Well I've come this far......  and I know it's good advice. And I hope you are doing the same.  ;) ;)
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 29, 2008, 15:50
My mouse is double clicking, it's been driving me nuts. I click on something like bookmarks, it's there, it's gone, it's there and it's gone again. Argh!!
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Rik on August 29, 2008, 17:05
their receptionist told me that it wasn't worth losing my health over and perhaps I should just walk away. Well I've come this far......  and I know it's good advice. And I hope you are doing the same.  ;) ;)

It is good advice, MB, but only you can decide when enough is enough. I'm doing fine, thanks, the heart is coming under control, so all I have to worry about is growing old disgracefully. Of course, I can look to Clive for tips on that. ;D :scoot:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 29, 2008, 17:14
Ive just published a book on this very subject Rik.................will send you a signed copy but it will mean a divorce within 6 weeks and a lot of distress to sheep  :devil: :dunno:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Rik on August 29, 2008, 17:42
Distressed sheep - is that a new form of decor?  ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 29, 2008, 17:45
Come on Rik......Clive and co wont believe you havnt had the delights of a good Welsh hillside in your time,bet it was raining though..................ba ba blacksheep have you any woooooooooooh  :devil:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Clive on August 29, 2008, 17:59
My mouse is double clicking, it's been driving me nuts. I click on something like bookmarks, it's there, it's gone, it's there and it's gone again. Argh!!

A swift re-boot usually cures it MB. 
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 30, 2008, 01:46
Yes Clive, a quick boot out the back door, did it.  ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: David on August 30, 2008, 02:12
A friend of mine tried this when she found her hubby playing away.........it worked as well..amazing so many applications for such a basic action ;D ;D
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: mistybear on August 30, 2008, 13:16
I'm doing fine, thanks, the heart is coming under control, so all I have to worry about is growing old disgracefully. Of course

I'm pleased to hear it Rik.  :thumbs:

A friend of mine tried this when she found her hubby playing away.........it worked as well..amazing so many applications for such a basic action ;D ;D

I throw a lot of things out the back door. Usually brooms, with spiders on the end of them.  :nerves:
Title: Re: A Flat Stomach
Post by: Rik on August 30, 2008, 16:15
I'm pleased to hear it Rik.  :thumbs:

Not as much as I was. ;)