PC Pals Forum
General Discussion => The Laughter Zone => Topic started by: Clive on November 07, 2011, 11:13
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July - Just got transferred with work from Leeds UK to our new home in Alicante,Southern Spain . Now this is a town that knows how to live!
Beautiful, sunny days and warm, balmy evenings. I watched the sunset from a deckchair by our pool yesterday. It was beautiful. I've finally found my new home. I love it here!
July - Really heating up now. It got to 31 today. No problem though. Living in air-conditioned home, driving air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun-worshipper – no blasted drizzly rain like back in London !!
July - Had the back yard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and rocks. No more mowing lawns for me! Another scorcher today, but I love it here. It’s Paradise!
July - The temperature hasn't been below 35 all week. How do these people get used to this kind of heat? At least today it's windy though. Keeps the flies off a bit. Acclimatizing is taking longer than we expected!
August - Fell asleep by the pool yesterday. Got second degree burns over 60% of my body. Missed three days off work. What a dumb thing to do.. Got to respect the old sun in a climate like this!
August 15th - Didn't notice Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car before I left for work this morning. By the time I got back to the car after work, Kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stuck to the upholstery. The car now smells like Whiskettes and cat-s**t. I've learned my lesson though: no more pets in this heat!
August 25th - This wind is a b*****d. It feels like a giant f****** blow-dryer, and it's hot as hell! The home air conditioner is on the blink and the repair man charged 200 euros just to drive over and tell me he needs to order parts from f****** Madrid .....The wife and kids are complaining all the time
August 26th - The temperature's up around 40 C and the parts still haven't
arrived for the f****** air conditioner. House is like an oven so we’ve all been
sleeping outside by the pool for the last 3 nights. Bloody 600,000 euros house
and we can't even go inside...... Why the hell did I ever come here?
AUGUST 27TH
Finally got the f****** air-conditioner fixed. It cost 1,500 EUROS and
gets the temperature down to around 25 degrees, but the humidity makes it
feel about 35!....Stupid repairman!.... F****** thief!!
AUGUST 29TH
If one more smart b*****d says 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm
going to f****** throttle him!..... F****** heat! By the time I get to work, the car
radiator is boiling, my f****** clothes are soaking f****** wet and I
smell like baked cat!..... this f****** place is the end of the Earth!!
AUGUST 30TH
Tried to run some errands after work, wore shorts, and sat on the
black leather upholstery in my car..... I thought my f****** arse was on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh, all the hair on the backs of my legs and off my f****** arse. Now
the car smells like burnt hair, fried arse and baked cat!.... F***, F***, F***!!!
AUGUST 31ST
The Weather Report might as well be a f****** recording!
Hot and sunny!... Hot and sunny!.... Hot and f****** sunny!... It never f****** changes! It's been too hot to do anything for 2 f****** months and the weather-man says it might really warm up next week!.... f***!!!!
SEPTEMBER 2ND
Doesn't it ever rain in this damn f****** place? Water restrictions
will be next, so my 5,000 EUROS worth of palms might just dry up and blow into the f****** pool. The only things that thrive in this f****** hell-hole are the f****** flies!... You don't dare open your mouth for fear of swallowing half a dozen of the little black b*****ds!!!
SEPTEMBER 3RD
Welcome to HELL! It got to 45 f****** degrees today. Now the air-conditioners packed up in the car. The repair man came to fix it and asked, 'Hot enough for you today?'.... I wanted to shove the f****** air-conditioner up his f****** arse!... Anyway, I had to spend the 2,500 EUROS mortgage payment to bail myself out of jail for assaulting the stupid prick!!.....f****** Alicante! What kind of sick, demented f****** idiot would want to live here???
SEPTEMBER 4TH - WHAT!!!! The Weatherman says "Heatwave on the way!" You are f****** kidding me???......................
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I've never liked heat - Simon and I would sympathise...
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Love it! :haha:
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Gill would sympathise too.
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None like it hot? :)
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I fall asleep when the temperature rises above 25C. It's a matter of principle ;D .
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None like it hot? :)
8-)
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I fall asleep when the temperature rises above 25C. It's a matter of principle ;D .
Is that blood or air temperature, Gill? :o:
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Eh?
I'm talking about the ambient environmental temperature. I must confess that my principles can be purchased by chilled glasses of Chardonnay or lager, but the effect is only temporary - my slumbers are guaranteed after a few of those :) .
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Rik's in a "funny" mood today, Gill. We haven't a clue what he's on about half of the time. ::) ;D
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And I don't know the other half of the time. :laugh:
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and I don't know the other half of the time :)x
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Too many halves, we should stick to pints. :)
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Well, if you're offering... :drink:
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Speckled Hen OK? ;)
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I always keep some in the fridge. But I don't drink it myself. :laugh:
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What else can you do with it?
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I prefer the lighter beers myself. Current favourite is Cobra, the Indian beer. Very smooth. :)
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One of our friends is very fond of it Gill. He would be very disappointed if the cupboard was bare. :laugh:
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I'm sure he'd be quite happy if the cupboard was bare at the end of his visit. In fact, he'd not only be happy, he'd be rather merry :) .
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I limit him to two, after which the whiskey comes out. :laugh:
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You distill him? :o
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He's 70 proof already! ;D
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:laugh: