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The Laughter Zone / Re: Go to Hell
« Last post by Clive on January 18, 2026, 19:42 »
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The Laughter Zone / Go to Hell
« Last post by Den on January 18, 2026, 15:53 »Trump dies from a virus and ends up in Hell, where the Devil is waiting for him.
“I’m not sure what to do with you,” says the Devil. “You’re definitely on my list, but I’m completely out of space. You have to stay here, though, so here’s my solution.
I’ve got three people down here who weren’t quite as bad as you.
I’ll let one of them go free, but you have to take their place — and I’ll even let you decide who leaves.”
Trump thinks this sounds like a pretty good deal and agrees.
The Devil opens the first door. Inside is Richard Nixon, standing next to a huge pool of water.
Over and over again, he dives in and resurfaces empty-handed.
That is his punishment for eternity.
“Nope,” says Trump. “I’m not a strong swimmer, and I’m not doing that all day.”
They move on to the second room.
Inside is Tony Blair, holding a sledgehammer in a room filled with rocks.
He swings the hammer again and again without rest.
“No way,” Trump says. “My shoulder is terrible. I’d be in agony smashing rocks all day.”
The Devil opens the third door.
Trump sees Bill Clinton lying naked on the floor, arms and legs staked out.
Bent over him is Monica Lewinsky, enthusiastically doing what she’s famous for.
Trump watches for a moment, then nods. “Yeah,” he says, “I can handle this.”
The Devil smiles and says, “Monica — you’re free to go.”
“I’m not sure what to do with you,” says the Devil. “You’re definitely on my list, but I’m completely out of space. You have to stay here, though, so here’s my solution.
I’ve got three people down here who weren’t quite as bad as you.
I’ll let one of them go free, but you have to take their place — and I’ll even let you decide who leaves.”
Trump thinks this sounds like a pretty good deal and agrees.
The Devil opens the first door. Inside is Richard Nixon, standing next to a huge pool of water.
Over and over again, he dives in and resurfaces empty-handed.
That is his punishment for eternity.
“Nope,” says Trump. “I’m not a strong swimmer, and I’m not doing that all day.”
They move on to the second room.
Inside is Tony Blair, holding a sledgehammer in a room filled with rocks.
He swings the hammer again and again without rest.
“No way,” Trump says. “My shoulder is terrible. I’d be in agony smashing rocks all day.”
The Devil opens the third door.
Trump sees Bill Clinton lying naked on the floor, arms and legs staked out.
Bent over him is Monica Lewinsky, enthusiastically doing what she’s famous for.
Trump watches for a moment, then nods. “Yeah,” he says, “I can handle this.”
The Devil smiles and says, “Monica — you’re free to go.”
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The Laughter Zone / Words
« Last post by Den on January 15, 2026, 19:51 »A radio station was running a competition – words that weren’t in the dictionary yet could still be used in a sentence that would make logical sense. The prize was a trip to Bali.
DJ: “96 FM here, what’s your name?”
Caller: “Hi, my name’s Dave.”
DJ: “Dave, what’s your word?”
Caller: “Goan... spelled G-O-A-N, pronounced ‘go-an’.”
DJ: “You are correct, Dave, ‘goan’ is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense?”
Caller: “Goan F yourself!”
The DJ cut the caller off and took other calls, all unsuccessful until...
DJ: “96 FM, what’s your name?”
Caller: “Hi, me name’s Jeff.”
DJ: “Jeff, what’s your word?”
Caller: “Smee, spelt S-M-E-E, pronounced ‘smee’.”
DJ: “You are correct, Jeff, ‘smee’ is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense?”
Caller: “Smee again! Goan F yourself!”?
DJ: “96 FM here, what’s your name?”
Caller: “Hi, my name’s Dave.”
DJ: “Dave, what’s your word?”
Caller: “Goan... spelled G-O-A-N, pronounced ‘go-an’.”
DJ: “You are correct, Dave, ‘goan’ is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense?”
Caller: “Goan F yourself!”
The DJ cut the caller off and took other calls, all unsuccessful until...
DJ: “96 FM, what’s your name?”
Caller: “Hi, me name’s Jeff.”
DJ: “Jeff, what’s your word?”
Caller: “Smee, spelt S-M-E-E, pronounced ‘smee’.”
DJ: “You are correct, Jeff, ‘smee’ is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense?”
Caller: “Smee again! Goan F yourself!”?
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The Buzz / Re: Brigitte Bardot, French screen legend, dies aged 91
« Last post by Clive on December 31, 2025, 21:18 »Very true.
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The Buzz / Re: Brigitte Bardot, French screen legend, dies aged 91
« Last post by Den on December 31, 2025, 19:25 »She lead a great life and did what she wanted to do. Sad but a wonderful time on this world for her. 
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The Buzz / Re: Brigitte Bardot, French screen legend, dies aged 91
« Last post by Clive on December 28, 2025, 17:29 »She was an inspiration and we all loved her. Very sad indeed.
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The Buzz / Brigitte Bardot, French screen legend, dies aged 91
« Last post by Simon on December 28, 2025, 10:37 »Brigitte Bardot, the French actor and singer who became an international sex symbol before turning her back on the film industry to become an animal rights activist, has died aged 91.
“The Brigitte Bardot foundation announces with immense sadness the death of its founder and president, Madame Brigitte Bardot, a world-renowned actress and singer, who chose to abandon her prestigious career to dedicate her life and energy to animal welfare and her foundation,” it said in a statement sent to Agence France-Presse on Sunday, without specifying the time or place of death.
Bardot shot to international fame with the 1956 film And God Created Woman, written and directed by her then-husband Roger Vadim, and for the next two decades embodied the idea of the archetypal “sex kitten”. In the early 1970s, however, she announced her retirement from acting and became increasingly active politically. Her outspoken support of animal rights evolved into incendiary comments about ethnic minorities and open support for France’s far-right Front National, resulting in a string of convictions for racial hatred.
As well as for cinema audiences, Bardot swiftly became an inspiration for intellectuals and artists; not least the young John Lennon and Paul McCartney, who demanded their then-girlfriends dye their hair blond in imitation of her. Columnist Raymond Cartier wrote a lengthy article about “le cas Bardot” in Paris-Match in 1958, while Simone de Beauvoir published her famous essay Brigitte Bardot and the Lolita Syndrome in 1959, framing the actor as France’s most liberated woman. In 1969, Bardot was chosen as the first real-life model for Marianne, the symbol of the French republic.
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2025/dec/28/brigitte-bardot-french-screen-legend-and-animal-rights-activist-dies
“The Brigitte Bardot foundation announces with immense sadness the death of its founder and president, Madame Brigitte Bardot, a world-renowned actress and singer, who chose to abandon her prestigious career to dedicate her life and energy to animal welfare and her foundation,” it said in a statement sent to Agence France-Presse on Sunday, without specifying the time or place of death.
Bardot shot to international fame with the 1956 film And God Created Woman, written and directed by her then-husband Roger Vadim, and for the next two decades embodied the idea of the archetypal “sex kitten”. In the early 1970s, however, she announced her retirement from acting and became increasingly active politically. Her outspoken support of animal rights evolved into incendiary comments about ethnic minorities and open support for France’s far-right Front National, resulting in a string of convictions for racial hatred.
As well as for cinema audiences, Bardot swiftly became an inspiration for intellectuals and artists; not least the young John Lennon and Paul McCartney, who demanded their then-girlfriends dye their hair blond in imitation of her. Columnist Raymond Cartier wrote a lengthy article about “le cas Bardot” in Paris-Match in 1958, while Simone de Beauvoir published her famous essay Brigitte Bardot and the Lolita Syndrome in 1959, framing the actor as France’s most liberated woman. In 1969, Bardot was chosen as the first real-life model for Marianne, the symbol of the French republic.
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2025/dec/28/brigitte-bardot-french-screen-legend-and-animal-rights-activist-dies