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Author Topic: Hunters and Fishermen  (Read 166 times)

Offline Simon

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Hunters and Fishermen
« on: July 08, 2021, 20:00 »
It was raining hard, and a big puddle had formed in front of an Irish pub.

An old man stood beside the puddle holding a stick with a string on the end and jiggled it up and down in the water.

A curious gentleman asked what he was doing.

“Fishing,” replied the old man.

“Poor old chap,” thought the gentleman, so he invited the old man to have a drink in the pub.

Feeling he should start some conversation while they were sipping their whiskey, the gentleman asked, “And how many have you caught today?”

“You’re the eighth.”

Two hunters chartered a small plane to take them into the wilderness for a week hunting moose. They managed to bag six moose. As they were loading the plane to return, the pilot said the small plane could carry only four.

The two hunters objected. “Last year we shot six. The pilot let us take them all, and he had the same kind of plane as yours.”

Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. The plane took off. However, while they were attempting to cross the mountains, the little plane gave out under the heavy load and went down. Somehow both hunters survived the crash.

After climbing out of the wreckage, one asked the other, “Any idea where we are?”

The other replied, “I think we’re pretty close to where we crashed last year!”

A game warden catches an unlicensed fisherman in the act.

“You’re going to pay a big fine for all those fish in your bucket,” the game warden says.

“But, officer, I didn’t catch these. They’re my pet fish, and I just bring them here to swim. When they’re done, they jump back into the bucket.”

“Oh really? This I’ve got to see. If you can prove it, I’ll let you go.”

The fisherman empties the bucket into the lake and waits patiently. A few minutes go by and nothing happens. The game warden asks, “So where are the fish?”

The fisherman replies, “What fish?”

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence; then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?"
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Offline Clive

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Re: Hunters and Fishermen
« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2021, 20:28 »
Brilliant!  :laugh:

Offline Den

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Re: Hunters and Fishermen
« Reply #2 on: July 09, 2021, 08:47 »
 :facepalm: ;D
Fourth in the 2018 Quiz of the Year but at least I beat Clive.

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