PC Pals Forum
General Discussion => The Laughter Zone => Topic started by: Simon on May 09, 2009, 17:40
-
A cowboy rides his horse up to a saloon.
All the patrons gawked as the cowboy kissed his horse on the arse before coming in and asking for a drink.
The bartender serves him and asks, "Mind if I ask why'd ya kiss your horse on the arse?"
The cowboy says, "It's 'cause I got chapped lips."
The bartender asks, "Does manure help them heal?"
Cowboy replies, "No, but it keeps me from licking them."
-
I suppose you could use a similar trick to stop biting your nails... :)x
-
Well, I've tried everything else! ;D
-
Me too. :)
-
When I was a kid there was a product that you applied to your finger nails to stop you biting them. Tasted terrible, but in the end, it didn't work.
Funny thing is, I've developed a skin condition which I scratch, my doctor told me it was due to the stress I've been under, and suggested that I start biting my nails again. ::)
-
I've tried the stuff you put on your nails, but got used to the taste, so it didn't work for me either, MB. I don't know what started it, but I've bitten my nails for as long as I can remember.
-
Alum was the bitter stuff. Didn't work for me either, though it came in handy when I started to shave. :) I was certainly biting by 8, almost certainly much younger.
-
I'm intrigued, how did it help with shaving?
-
I can't remember when I started either, but quite young.
That bitter stuff was also used on my brothers thumb, that he used to suck. Actually, I think he still does.... :)x
I love watching Ricky Ponting when a match is in the balance, fingers nails flying everywhere. One match I thought he'd have to get his shoes off, as I couldn't imagine that he had any finger nails left.
-
I'm intrigued, how did it help with shaving?
Alum is an astringent and so could be used to stop bleeding.
-
Ah, I've always used an electric. Bet that used to sting a bit! :horror:
-
Who's Ricky Ponting, MB?
-
Ah, I've always used an electric. Bet that used to sting a bit! :horror:
It did. :)
-
Who's Ricky Ponting, MB?
A cricketer.
-
Ah, sport. :scoot:
-
Well, some think so. Others regard it as an exercise in meditation. ;D
-
I used to regard it as an exercise in sun bathing, at school. :)
-
I always avoided it at school. Small hard balls coming by way at speed was always going to be a recipe for disaster.
-
Given a choice of that or football, I opted for cricket, but stayed as far from the 'action' as possible, by fielding from a distance! ;D
-
I opted for athletics and went cross-country running. Where my cunning plan went wrong was that, one week they were trialling for an inter-schools competition without telling us, and I used to know a nice little shortcut so found myself in the team. Oops... ;D
-
:lol: I used to hate cross country as well, especially as there's wasn't much 'country' involved around South London.
The only sport I didn't mind, and was reasonably competent at, was tennis, but it wasn't usually one of the options.
-
We had football, cross country or rowing in winter, and substituted cricket for football in summer. Unless you could swim, you couldn't row, so my decision was pretty easy.
-
Yes, I couldn't swim either, and still can't!
-
I can, but only in a downwards direction. ;)
-
;D
-
A cricketer.
Captain of the Australian Cricket team........ well, most of the time.
Ah, sport. :scoot:
Oh, flintoff. ;) ;D
-
I'm bowled over. :wub: ;D
-
I wonder if a Googly has become a Google? :)
-
Or a bogey, a boogle? Oh, that's golf isn't it? :)x
-
I think it's a "doosra" now. :dunno:
-
How about a Chinaman? That would have to change for PC's sake. :)
-
And they don't even play cricket. :dunno:
-
Play it? They can't even say it! ;D
-
:lol2:
-
When I was a kid there was a product that you applied to your finger nails to stop you biting them. Tasted terrible, but in the end, it didn't work.
It was a herb known as biitter aloes MB. Alum is the mineral aluminium sulphate used as an astringent. ::)
-
Thanks Clive.
ALOES POWDER (BITTER ALOES)
Used in a graveyard bottle spell to silence the lips of those who speak evil lies.
No wonder it didn't work. :devil:
-
;D