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91
The Laughter Zone / Re: Groaner thread
« Last post by Simon on December 26, 2020, 21:24 »
:aarrgh:
92
The Laughter Zone / Re: Groaner thread
« Last post by Clive on December 26, 2020, 20:42 »
I've just started a part time job in a factory making chess pieces.

I'm on knights next week.
93
The star of Bethlehem would have been a close conjunction of Jupiter with Venus which is a considerably brighter planet than Saturn.  But you can fast forward the video.
94
I've not got 2 hours to watch that!

I tried to see it last night but unfortunately it was too cloudy.

Some of a religions persuasion might see this as a 'Bethlehem' star - a second coming to save us all from the pandemic, which has fallen nicely in line with the release of the first vaccine.   :thumb:
96
The Laughter Zone / Field Hospital
« Last post by Simon on December 18, 2020, 23:49 »
A general was visiting a field hospital to try and boost morale. He approached a recuperating soldier and said, "And what is wrong with you, soldier?"

The soldier replied, "I have gonorrhea, sir."

"I see," said the general. "And what is the treatment for your condition?"

"I have to scrub my genitals three times a day with a medicated stiff-bristle brush, sir."

"And what is your greatest wish, soldier?" asked the general.

"To get back to full health and get back into the field, sir."

"Excellent! Carry on."

The general moved on to the next bed. "And what is wrong with you, soldier?" he inquired.

"I have dysentery, sir."

"Not so good," said the general. "And what is the treatment for your condition?"

"I have to scrub my arse three times a day with a medicated stiff-bristle brush, sir."

"And what is your greatest wish, soldier?" asked the general.

"To get back to full health and get back into the field, sir."

"Splendid! Carry on."

The general moved on to the last bed. "And what is wrong with you, soldier?" he inquired.

"I have laryngitis, sir," croaked the soldier.

"Oh dear," said the general. "And what is the treatment for your condition?"

"I have to scrub my throat three times a day with a medicated stiff-bristle brush, sir."

"And what is your greatest wish, soldier?" asked the general.

"To one day get the brush before those two, sir."
97
The Buzz / Re: Aretha Franklyn Queen of soul dies age 76
« Last post by Clive on December 18, 2020, 09:36 »
Thanks Gill.  You have to bear in mind that news takes much longer to reach Wales.   :)x
98
The Buzz / Re: Aretha Franklyn Queen of soul dies age 76
« Last post by Simon on December 17, 2020, 23:48 »
Perhaps her posthumous releases didn't do so well, so she's trying again?   :)x
99
The Buzz / Re: Aretha Franklyn Queen of soul dies age 76
« Last post by GillE on December 17, 2020, 22:57 »
You're comparing Aretha Franklin to Jesus?  :omg:

As I understand it, he was the inspiration of her source material in the early days of her career, so perhaps I'll let you get away with that.  After all, we're just about in the season of good will to all men.
100
The Laughter Zone / Re: Do They Know It's Covid Time?
« Last post by Clive on December 17, 2020, 22:06 »
Brilliant!   :thumb:
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