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The Laughter Zone / Re: Dear Wife
« Last post by Clive on October 11, 2025, 08:24 »
Recent Posts
73
The Laughter Zone / Dear Wife
« Last post by Den on October 10, 2025, 21:58 »Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand-new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Husband
PS don’t try to find me. Your SISTER, Carla, & I are moving away together! Have a great life!
.
.
.
Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping, too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if I can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers, I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So, when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets for a holiday vacation. But when I got home you were gone ... Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Your Free and Rich EX-Wife
PS … I hope you and my SISTER have a great life.
By-The-Way, did she tell you her name use to be 'Carl' before her operation?....
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand-new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Husband
PS don’t try to find me. Your SISTER, Carla, & I are moving away together! Have a great life!
.
.
.
Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping, too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if I can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers, I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So, when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets for a holiday vacation. But when I got home you were gone ... Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Your Free and Rich EX-Wife
PS … I hope you and my SISTER have a great life.
By-The-Way, did she tell you her name use to be 'Carl' before her operation?....
74
The Buzz / Re: Dame Patricia Routledge dies at 96
« Last post by Simon on October 03, 2025, 21:42 »
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The Buzz / Re: Dame Patricia Routledge dies at 96
« Last post by Clive on October 03, 2025, 20:51 »I can't stand Vera either!
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The Buzz / Re: Dame Patricia Routledge dies at 96
« Last post by Simon on October 03, 2025, 16:59 »I'd forgotten all about Hetty Wainthropp. But then, I never watched it. Wasn't it virtually identical to Vera?
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The Buzz / Re: Dame Patricia Routledge dies at 96
« Last post by Clive on October 03, 2025, 16:44 »I loathed Hetty Wainthropp! But she was brilliant in Keeping Up Appearances. 
79
The Buzz / Mark Volman dies age 78
« Last post by Clive on October 03, 2025, 14:12 »He was a guitarist , singer and songwriter who had a string of hits in the 60s with the Turtles including Happy Together. He worked with John Lennon, Frank Zappa and Marc Bolan.
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The Buzz / Dame Patricia Routledge dies at 96
« Last post by Simon on October 03, 2025, 14:06 »Actress Dame Patricia Routledge, known for playing Hyacinth Bucket in classic TV sitcom Keeping Up Appearances, has died at the age of 96.
She also starred in Alan Bennett's TV monologues and played BBC One's amateur sleuth Hetty Wainthropp, while also enjoying an acclaimed stage career.
Her agent told the PA news agency on Friday that she died "peacefully in her sleep this morning surrounded by love".
The BBC's director of comedy was among those paying tribute, saying she "made millions laugh and left a legacy that will always be remembered with gratitude and admiration".
Her agent's statement said: "Even at 96-years old, Dame Patricia's passion for her work and for connecting with live audiences never waned, just as new generations of audiences have continued to find her through her beloved television roles.
"She will be dearly missed by those closest to her and by her devoted admirers around the world."
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/czdjegvjz3do
She also starred in Alan Bennett's TV monologues and played BBC One's amateur sleuth Hetty Wainthropp, while also enjoying an acclaimed stage career.
Her agent told the PA news agency on Friday that she died "peacefully in her sleep this morning surrounded by love".
The BBC's director of comedy was among those paying tribute, saying she "made millions laugh and left a legacy that will always be remembered with gratitude and admiration".
Her agent's statement said: "Even at 96-years old, Dame Patricia's passion for her work and for connecting with live audiences never waned, just as new generations of audiences have continued to find her through her beloved television roles.
"She will be dearly missed by those closest to her and by her devoted admirers around the world."
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/czdjegvjz3do